Vaginismus: what it is and how a sexologist treats it
Specialist sexologist. Vaginismus is an involuntary contraction of the muscles around the vagina that makes penetration painful or impossible. It is not “all in your head” and it is not something to endure. The gynaecologist first, always. When the doctor says everything is fine and the pain stays, we work on the body’s fear of being touched, and it can be worked on.
What to know before you book
- Where
- Str. Crișan 13, Brașov · At the practice in Brașov, or online, on video
- Hours
- Monday - Thursday, 15:00 - 20:00
- Fee
- 1000 RON per session, individual or as a couple
- Session length
- 60 minutes
- How to book
- Pick a time in the calendar, call, or write on WhatsApp.
Vaginismus usually has two parts that keep each other going. One is in the muscles: the pelvic floor tightens by reflex. The other is anticipation: “it is going to hurt again”. Fear puts the body on alert, on alert the muscles tighten, arousal and lubrication drop, and the pain that follows makes the fear even bigger the next time.
The longer you put it off, the deeper the body learns the reflex. That is why the work happens on two levels. The physical side, the pelvic floor, is assessed and treated, sometimes together with a doctor or a specialised pelvic floor physiotherapist. The psychological side, the circle between fear and contraction, is worked on with a sexologist, in steps.
I am a psychologist and a sexologist, not a doctor: I do not examine and I do not treat organic causes. Everything about the practice, the fee and booking is on the sexology page.
In short
- Specialist sexologist and specialist clinical psychologist
- More than 20 years of clinical practice
- Sessions at the practice in Brașov or online
- What belongs to the gynaecologist stays with the gynaecologist
Signed: Alina Robu
I am Alina Robu — specialist sexologist, specialist clinical psychologist and specialist integrative psychotherapist, with more than 20 years of clinical practice. I am a doctoral candidate in psychology and neuroscience and co-founder of the BrainMap Institute.
I practise sexology as a psychologist. What belongs to a doctor goes to the doctor first, and if a gynaecologist or a physiotherapist is needed alongside me, I tell you at the first consultation.
- Specialist integrative psychotherapist
- Specialist clinical psychologist
- Specialist sexologist
- Hypnotherapist
- Neurospecialist and neurofeedback therapist, certified by IFEN Germany
- PhD candidate in psychology and neuroscience
How I work on vaginismus
The gynaecologist first
An infection, a hormonal cause or endometriosis is checked before any psychological conversation. Nothing is assumed.
Safety, not willpower
Muscles do not relax on command. The body needs to feel safe for arousal to be able to settle in.
At your own pace
Nothing is done before you are ready. If there is a hard experience behind it, we start with safety, not with the sexual side.
Four steps, in this order
The first session
An hour of conversation, with no examination. What is happening, since when, what the doctor said and what is still to be checked.
Understanding the mechanism
Why the muscles tighten on their own and where the fear comes from. That alone takes away part of the fear.
Calming the alert
Regulating the nervous system and paying attention to what you feel now, not to what might hurt. Hypnotherapy, when the body reacts as if it were not safe.
Touch comes back
In stages, without intercourse as the goal, on your own or with your partner, if they want to. I explain the steps to you in words; I do not demonstrate them.
Vaginismus or dyspareunia: gynaecologist or sexologist?
| See a gynaecologist first when | See a sexologist when |
|---|---|
| The pain is new or gets worse from month to month | The gynaecologist said everything is fine and the pain has stayed |
| There is bleeding outside your period or after sex | Your body tightens before any touch |
| It hurts when you resume your sex life after giving birth | You have started avoiding closeness |
| You have burning, stinging or other symptoms | You tense up just thinking about closeness |
Dyspareunia is pain that keeps coming back during sex; vaginismus is the contraction that makes penetration painful or impossible. Today both fall into the same category. Often you need both: the doctor and the sexologist.
The table scrolls sideways.
What women come to a sexologist with
Sexologist online, for vaginismus
For many women it is easier to start from home, especially for the first meetings.
How it works
On video, 60 minutes, at the same fee as at the practice. We agree on the platform, Zoom or WhatsApp, the day before.
What you need
A place where you are alone and nobody can hear you, and a stable connection.
The medical limit
Online does not shorten the way to the gynaecologist. If something needs checking, you find out at the first session.
Pain is not something to endure.
What people ask me before the first consultation
What is vaginismus?
How is vaginismus treated?
Is vaginismus psychological?
What is dyspareunia?
Do I have to see a gynaecologist first?
Does my partner have to come too?
What is the first session like?
How much does it cost and how do I book?
Where is the sexology practice in Brașov?
In the press and on air
The subjects I explain publicly, in national publications and in podcasts.
Not sure this is the right field for you?
A first conversation clears up exactly that. You tell me what is happening, I tell you honestly which field the work belongs to and whether someone else is needed.